An abusive relationship continues due to fear and emotional stagnation. As soon as the abuser feels their hold start to slip then the abuse escalates. Hands should be used to hold and caress loved ones, not to inflict pain, physical damage, and terror in those that the abuser professes to love. Women should treasure their man and do everything possible to make them feel secure and beloved, instead of putting the man down and belittling them. Men should protect their woman and honor them instead of battering or screaming at them. If more people understood the different forms that abuse can take and had the strength to walk out there would be fewer abusive relationships happening. You can not change an abuser so the best thing you can do is get away completely, protecting yourself and any children. The most dangerous time for a man or woman who is in an abusive relationship is when they try to leave, and this fact should be considered when this point is reached. The abuse starts out gradually, and the abuse victim needs to stand up in the beginning to prevent further problems later on.