Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do? Turn out the lights

Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price

Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket

Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down

A compliment is verbal sunshine

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so

Never raise your hand to your children ð it leaves your midsection unprotected

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home