Apu I need a keg and a six pack to hold me until I tap the keg

Trying is the first step to failure

Homer [drunk] Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him

Mmm... Organized Crime

“When will you Australians learn? In America we stopped using corporal punishment, and things have never been better! The streets are safe. Old people strut confidently through the darkest alleys. And the weak and nerdy are admired for their computer-programming abilities. So, like us, let your children run wild and free, because, as the old saying goes, "let your children run wild and free

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems

mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.

Oh yeah drugs, ya gotta have drugs.

I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.