Following the Jewish tradition, a dispenser of schmaltz (liquid chicken fat) is kept on the table to give the vampires heartburn if they get through the garlic defense

Even today, well-brought-up English girls are taught by their mothers to boil all veggies for at least a month and a half, just in case one of the dinner guests turns up without his teeth

Health food makes me sick

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The food in such places is so tasteless because the members associate spices and garlic with just the sort of people they're trying to keep out

Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us

People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world

As far as I'm concerned,whom is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler