I speak two languages, Body and English.
Goes to gym: "Thank you god for yoga pants!" Goes to Walmart: "God why yoga pants!?"
He stole my heart So I stole his last name.
Life isn't weird it's just the people in it
Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad? Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it
The slow motion scene where the person walks away from an explosion but it's me walking away from self checkout without needing assistance.
I have never made a friend from whom I could not separate, and I have never made an enemy that I could not approach