Breaking up with someone is never easy, even when you both realize that the relationship is going nowhere. When the other person is still in love with you and you no longer return these feelings breaking up can be even more difficult. You may be worried that they will start a scene or make you feel very badly about breaking up, but you can not let these fears and concerns stop you if you know the relationship is not right for you. Instead it is important to handle the break up in a way that is least hurtful while making it clear that you are over.
Prepare Yourself Before the Event
Before the big break up you should prepare yourself. Think about whether you truly want the relationship to end. Evaluate your reasons for breaking up and make sure that this is the right move. You also need to accept the fact that friendship after the break up may not be possible because the other person may still care to much to do this in the beginning. You may want to avoid hurting the other person but if you know they are not the one for you than it would be more hurtful to continue on and let the other person believe that there is a future together when there is none.
Breaking Up the Right Way
There never seems to be an ideal time to break up with someone, but this should be avoided during times of crisis and turmoil. You should also not blurt out that you want to break up just because you are fighting and angry, because you may choose words that are more hurtful than they have to be when emotions are running high. Explain to your partner that you need to talk, don't ambush them or wait until they are busy and distracted and then try to slip in the news.
You should discuss this in person, not send a text or email in the hope of avoiding any drama because this can be extremely painful. Be honest about your feelings and the reasons why you believe breaking up is the right thing to do. Try to phrase your reasons in the gentlest terms possible but make sure yu do not give your partner false hope or lead them on into thinking that the romantic relationship can be saved.
Moving On is the Next Step
Now that you have broken up it is time to move on, and that may be easier for you than it is for your ex if they are still in love with you. You should not feel guilty or try to blame yourself, relationships end and as long as the break up occurred the right way and for the right reasons it is a positive thing for you both. If you do run into your ex out in public be polite and cordial but remember that they still have feelings for you so keep the contact brief and friendly.
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